If you want to be the reason your attorney reconsiders his entire career, this is your step-by-step guide.
1- Disappearing After Signing the Retainer 😶🌫️
You signed on the dotted line and then vanished: no calls, no emails, no medical records. Bonus points if you only resurface to ask, “So…do I have a check yet?”
2- Posting Everything on Social Media 📱
You share injury selfies, tag your attorney, and even poll your followers for legal advice. Your lawyer is now in full PR crisis mode.
3- Ignoring Doctor’s Orders Then Blaming Your Lawyer 💊
You skip physical therapy and miss appointments, yet still demand a six-figure settlement. “But you said this was a million-dollar case!”
4- Bringing Your Whole Family to Every Meeting 👪
Your lawyer thought you’d show up solo. Instead, you brought your sister, her second husband, your best friends, and a woman you call Nana who isn’t actually a relative. Now it’s a town hall, not a legal consult.
5- Refusing to Settle (Then Complaining About Legal Fees) 💸
Rejecting a fair offer because you “deserve more,” then getting mad when the case drags on and the check shrinks. “Why am I paying you so much if I’m not rich yet?”
6- Shopping for a “Second Opinion” at Every Step 🛒
After every milestone, you get “just a little feedback” from another attorney, TikTok, or your neighbor who “knows a guy.” Nothing says loyalty like prepping your next switch before your lawyer even files.
Pro Tip:
Make your attorney’s job easier. Be honest, be present, and save the drama for your nearest and dearest.