Sometimes God can be great. Sometimes God can be cruel. And one of the cruelest things He can do as you’re navigating the chaos of a personal injury, is bring an attorney into your life who is compassionate, understanding, professional and unfortunately very attractive.
At some point you may feel tempted to tell your attorney how you feel, especially if you believe the laws of chemistry are on your side. Here’s why you should maybe, possibly, absolutely NOT:
1- Your Attorney May Have to Withdraw from Your Case ⚖️
If you’re daydreaming about your lawyer and not your lawsuit, get ready for a plot twist: attorneys are bound by rules stricter than who is in charge of the Thanksgiving turkey every year. Confess your undying love, and the next thing you know you’re getting a, “We regret to inform you” letter and starting over with the office paralegal who’s about as warm as a courtroom bench in January.
2- You May Not Be Able to Handle the Fallout 🫣
You think you’ll feel better if you just get it off your chest. What’s the worst that could happen? But what you’re not picturing is the lifetime reel of cringe, as you remember the moment you told a man wearing a suit that costs more than three months of your rent, “I have feelings for you.” Now every time you call the office, you’ll wonder if he’s putting you on mute to say, “She’s the one. The one who said it.”
3- Your Focus Will No Longer Be On The Case 🥰
Remember the good old days when your biggest worry was whether your MRI report would help your claim? Now you’re analyzing phone calls, text messages, and the length of his silences like you’re decoding an episode of Severance. Spoiler: the insurance company is not covering emotional damages from unrequited lawyer-crushes.
4- It’s Not Worth the Risks 😬
Best-case scenario? He’s flattered, but married (because why couldn’t it get any worse?) and he gives you a gentle, “This can’t happen.” Worst-case scenario? He tells his partners, you’re labeled That Client, and suddenly your file is getting passed around like a gluten-free fruitcake during the holidays. Either way, your romantic subplot becomes the talk of the office Slack channel, and not in a cute way.
Pro Tip:
Tell a rabbi, a bishop or a priest if you must, but do not tell your attorney.